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Prompt:
Prompt:
Author: Dranders
Requested feedback: Light criticism
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
As Jane reclined in bed with her laptop on her knees, an ad for a woman's pink hoodie embroidered with the phrase "God is great, dogs are good, and people are crazy" appeared in the margins of her Facebook feed. She couldn't help but think those were some pretty bold claims. This hoodie has the audacity to assert those statements as fact, yet they were most definitely debatable. She took another sip of beer, placed the bottle back on the nightstand next to the others, and read the top line again:
"GOD IS GREAT"
Is God inherently great? Admittedly, Jane had had somewhat of a religious deconstruction in her adult life. But even for those that do believe in God, what exactly constitutes God's greatness? She remembered seeing a clip of Neil deGrasse Tyson where he examined this concept. Basically, God is seen as someone who is both all-powerful and all-good. God can do literally anything, and God loves you unconditionally. But why then, do bad things happen? Why does God allow for childhood leukemia, or tsunamis that kill 200,000 people, or terrorist attacks, or global pandemics? Essentially, it means God is either not all-powerful and things are out of his control, OR, he is not all-good and wants humans to suffer. Damn, Neil deGrasse Tyson puts things in perspective.
She sighed. "I don’t think God is great."
Jane's eyes went back to the hoodie, and she re-read the second line:
"DOGS ARE GOOD"
Are dogs inherently good? Jane typically adored dogs. She walked her neighbor's two dogs several times a week, and she was ready to adopt a pup of her own this year. But they can't ALL be good, she thought. Her sister had a 130-pound Mastiff-mix that was a fucking menace. The thing was so aggressive and so bad with people that he was almost never permitted to leave the property (even walking him in their suburban neighborhood ran the risk of him biting a kid's arm in half or knocking an elderly person to the ground). He wouldn't learn even the simplest commands, and he wasn't fun to be around.
She smiled deviously as she fantasized about releasing the beast into the woods, like that scene in Air Bud ("Go on, get out of here! You're free now!").
"So I guess no, dogs are not necessarily good," she said out loud to no one.
Jane took another sip of beer and spilled half of it down the side of her face, a tell-tale sign that she'd had enough (and the damp spot on her pillow reminded her that drinking in bed was not normal). Finally she scanned the last line of text on the hoodie:
"PEOPLE ARE CRAZY"
Are people inherently crazy? She didn't have the strength to touch that one. It was too late at night and she was too drunk. "Crazy" is such a vague concept. Does it refer to mental illness, or just acting weird? It's so subjective. Furthermore, she found it difficult to believe that the average person had ever spent considerable time with a legitimately "crazy" person. People can be afflicted with a myriad of mental health issues, but the majority of the population still manages to be functioning members of society. She recalled an NPR segment she had once heard. In the mid-20th century, truly crazy people could check themselves into a taxpayer-funded mental hospital, but Reagan closed all of those down to save a buck. So where do all the crazy people go now?
"I suppose most people are not crazy." She mumbled, her eyes barely open.
Jane slapped her laptop shut, plugged her phone into the charger, and clicked off the bedside lamp. As she drifted into a deep, dissatisfying, dehydrated sleep, her brain gave one last parting thought:
"The hoodie is made of fucking lies."
"GOD IS GREAT"
Is God inherently great? Admittedly, Jane had had somewhat of a religious deconstruction in her adult life. But even for those that do believe in God, what exactly constitutes God's greatness? She remembered seeing a clip of Neil deGrasse Tyson where he examined this concept. Basically, God is seen as someone who is both all-powerful and all-good. God can do literally anything, and God loves you unconditionally. But why then, do bad things happen? Why does God allow for childhood leukemia, or tsunamis that kill 200,000 people, or terrorist attacks, or global pandemics? Essentially, it means God is either not all-powerful and things are out of his control, OR, he is not all-good and wants humans to suffer. Damn, Neil deGrasse Tyson puts things in perspective.
She sighed. "I don’t think God is great."
Jane's eyes went back to the hoodie, and she re-read the second line:
"DOGS ARE GOOD"
Are dogs inherently good? Jane typically adored dogs. She walked her neighbor's two dogs several times a week, and she was ready to adopt a pup of her own this year. But they can't ALL be good, she thought. Her sister had a 130-pound Mastiff-mix that was a fucking menace. The thing was so aggressive and so bad with people that he was almost never permitted to leave the property (even walking him in their suburban neighborhood ran the risk of him biting a kid's arm in half or knocking an elderly person to the ground). He wouldn't learn even the simplest commands, and he wasn't fun to be around.
She smiled deviously as she fantasized about releasing the beast into the woods, like that scene in Air Bud ("Go on, get out of here! You're free now!").
"So I guess no, dogs are not necessarily good," she said out loud to no one.
Jane took another sip of beer and spilled half of it down the side of her face, a tell-tale sign that she'd had enough (and the damp spot on her pillow reminded her that drinking in bed was not normal). Finally she scanned the last line of text on the hoodie:
"PEOPLE ARE CRAZY"
Are people inherently crazy? She didn't have the strength to touch that one. It was too late at night and she was too drunk. "Crazy" is such a vague concept. Does it refer to mental illness, or just acting weird? It's so subjective. Furthermore, she found it difficult to believe that the average person had ever spent considerable time with a legitimately "crazy" person. People can be afflicted with a myriad of mental health issues, but the majority of the population still manages to be functioning members of society. She recalled an NPR segment she had once heard. In the mid-20th century, truly crazy people could check themselves into a taxpayer-funded mental hospital, but Reagan closed all of those down to save a buck. So where do all the crazy people go now?
"I suppose most people are not crazy." She mumbled, her eyes barely open.
Jane slapped her laptop shut, plugged her phone into the charger, and clicked off the bedside lamp. As she drifted into a deep, dissatisfying, dehydrated sleep, her brain gave one last parting thought:
"The hoodie is made of fucking lies."
1 comment:
Hey man, I loved this. Really well-written, and it managed to tie in a bunch of interesting thoughts and ideas. (Sidenote: I hate dogs.) What I really liked about it was how everything collapsed at the end, and you're left wondering not about dogs or god or whatever, but about the protagonist. Is she okay? What's her deal? I liked how there was a remove, how she was obviously hiding something and distracting herself with some bullshit Facebook ad. Felt mysterious. This is barely a criticism, just wondering out loud: I wonder if there is a way to underline the conclusion, pull the spotlight back more forcefully toward the narrator, to highlight the fact that there is a tension within her that we're not really privy to. Overall: great stuff, and I really appreciate you doing this.
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