Complacency, Pam

It seems that there is a formula for creating the type of music that Johnny Football Hero (successfully!) creates. It may not apply to every song, but I believe a number of songs on Complacency do follow the same formula. That formula being: start off a little slow and mellow and then slam the listener with a moment of gritty vocals and energetic drumming that takes you into the real guts of the song.

I have no idea how to describe this moment in music terms... I would compare it to when the "beat drops" in electronic music. Like, that's not a breakdown, is it? I've only ever heard Joe use that term and I don't listen to that type of music typically, so I really have no examples to compare to. Whatever that key moment is called, it's done well in each instance, however, I guess it does get a little predictable on Johnny Football Hero's part.

As predictable as it may be, I do think that being able to successfully create a moment like that is essential to Johnny Football Hero, the music they create, and to what genre of band they are. And what genre of band are they? Glad you asked—well, on the Bandcamp website, Johnny Football Hero's tags include: alternative, emo, pop punk, punk, post hardcore, swancore (literally the first time I've ever read that word), and Philadelphia (nice).

I was personally very surprised at myself for liking a band that's even remotely considered post hardcore... it made me ask myself whether I should go back and listen to Britt's past picks (my conclusion... let's not go that far). There were moments that pushed me to the very edge of my music comfort zone, but never off the cliff. I'm glad I expanded my horizons and listened to a band that I certainly would not have found on my own.

Complacency, Sunny

On Johnny at Johnny's.

We are seated downstairs at a booth by the bar. The atmosphere is warm and inviting, a friendly vibe on a chilly winter day. Décor feels as a mid-century diner with a few polished upgrades for accent.

It's a relaxing environment to be in. This punk/emo blend immediately rings as familiar and exciting. "Cap'n Oblivious" sets the tone for the EP both musically and thematically. The sampling of the Sad Horse Show catches your ear. Is it called a sample if it's from a TV show? Can they do that? Our waiter soon approaches.

W: Hello, welcome. It's covered under Section 107 for fair use. Can I get you guys started with some drinks?

Orders are made for three cocktails, all of which have the typically punny names like "Autumn in New York." Priced at $11-13, they are delicious and pack a punch; affordable compared to a Bel Air equivalent, pricey compared to most of BaltCo. Other little "price plays" are here, such as fries coming out in a metal cone with aioli. Food comes out hot and tasty; everything is quite good—you just need to realize you're in for a three-martini lunch.

The EP develops with JFH bringing more range to their punk/emo sound. The solo towards the end of "Complacency Pt. 1" and the progression of "Sister Hellen" are both pretty captivating, but for different reasons. "Aurora" cuts a different way as well, with "Complacency Pt. 2" bringing you back to center for the big end.

The bar has two large TVs, which are a bit of a clash with the quiet bar setup. It's probably good overall, just a bit confused. Hard not to remember Tierra Whack from last week and how tight and put together that EP was, whereas this week we have something not quite EP, not quite LP. If you're bought in, this is perfectly fine, but if you're not, I could see it grating the wrong way. For my money, I'm enjoying another rock song about having brave faces.

W: You’re remembering Spanish Love Songs, such simpler times. We've got fresh baked cookies made, would all like some?

We order three cookies.

Johnny/Johnny's: 4/5 pukes

Complacency, Joe

All 52 Record Club Albums of 2021, Ranked
(*ranked based on how I feel about each album now, not how I felt about it when I wrote the corresponding review)
(**tried not to repeat any opinions I already described in the review itself)
(***I linked to each of my reviews, but in many cases, maybe even most cases, there were better reviews written that week, so check out the archives to see some of the better work PoYB's contributors put forth the past 52 weeks)
(****Should go without saying at this point, but my opinions about any album are not a reflection on the person who picked the album in the first place, and indeed, if you picked an album and I didn't like it, then that means you are challenging me and us and yourself with something otherwise unfamiliar or unloved, and I tend to appreciate those picks more than safe fun 4/5 album picks in the grand scheme of things)

52. 30 by Adele — The only good part about COVID making it unsafe to be in a Target again is that I might never have to listen to Adele again.

51. A Written Testimony by Jay Electronica — I dunno, man, I mentioned it during my review, and I've given it some more thought in the past eleven months, but featuring tangential antisemitism, whether unintentionally or in dog whistle form, hasn't really sat right with me.

50. My Head Is an Animal by Of Monsters and Men — If Jay and Adele have some baggage that precluded me from liking their music, then what can we say about OMaM other than they put out a fucking rat turd of an album in 2012 and it hits like a nuclear fart in 2021. No baggage required.

49. BE by BTS — Putting a three-minute field recording of the band patting themselves on the back for their success right in the middle of the goddamn 28-minute album is in such poor taste that I almost have to admire BTS for peddling this shit to their certifiably insane fanbase and milking those suckers for all they got.

48. Homesick by A Day to Remember — A Week to Forget.

47. When Christmas Comes Around... by Kelly Clarkson — Alright, alright, Christmas is over, and the pessimism is back: this album stinks.

46. OK Human by Weezer — I have one good thing to say about OK Human, and I hope you consider it higher than high praise—OK Human was not the worst Weezer album released in 2021.

45. Howlin Mercy by John Campbell — Letting a random music generator choose our album of the week was a gambit that paid off exactly one dividend (Sunny's The Wire parody). Everything else about this album put me in the red.

44. twentyeleven by Sophistafunk — Can't you just not... be like this at all? Is that so hard to ask?

43. We Are Not Your Kind by Slipknot — The album that forever altered the K*** family dynamic. I can't say I'm particularly thankful, per se, but I'll certainly never forget it.

42. Silver Ladders by Mary Lattimore — 2021 started, not with a bang, but with a harp solo.

41. Emphatically No. by Cheekface — The world would be a better place if we burned the internet to the ground. Use the memes as tinder.

40. And It's Still Alright by Nathaniel Rateliff — Being a real music critic requires you to have a cold, callous heart, PART I.

39. Push Back by Jetty Bones — Being a real music critic requires you to have a cold, callous heart, PART II.

38. Be Thankful for What You Got by William DeVaughn — Some of these albums are picked up out of the ditch by their one all-caps GREAT song. That song is for this album is obviously the title track, an all-timer. I can't even remember the rest.

37. Mood Valiant by Hiatus Kaiyote — This album was like an episode of Nailed It!, in that it was like, okay, I have the ingredients and the directions right here, and yet it still came out looking like this?!

36. Tell Me You Love Me by Demi Lovato — Look, we're on the same side. I care about systematic oppression. I'm down for whatever fighting that battle looks like to you. But no matter how progressive I am, the headline "Demi Lovato Serenades Ghost Who Faced Trauma from Sexism, Receives Floating Ovation" will never not be funny to me. God bless lizard person Demi Lovato, my favorite Record Club alumni.

35. Valentine by Snail Mail — I was all about giving this album a second shot to be great a couple months or years down the line, but man, the fact that it was on so many end-of-year lists really left me feeling like I'll never nail down this one.

34. Piecing It Together by Free Throw — IT'S PRETTY GOOD/OKAY.

33. Masterpiece Theatre by Marianas Trench — An album that made me just feel like we were circling the wagon on Carly Rae Jepson, should've just did the real thing instead of some dude behind it, ya feel me?

32. Life in Cartoon Motion by Mika — The thought only just occurred to me to see what this man has been up to since 2006. Has he done anything under the radar in America, has he slunk back to Europe, or what? At the very least, this looks like a man who updates his own Wikipedia page:

31. Duke Nukem by Duke Deuce — You hate Cousin Eddie when he shows up midway through Christmas Vacation, but you can't help but have a weird affection for him by the end of it. Q: What would Duke Deuce say if he knew he was being compared to Cousin Eddie? A: WHAT THE FUUUUUUUUUUUU

30. BOOK by They Might Be Giants — Record Club addresses a blind spot that I didn't even know I had before the album was picked. The results? Not bad.

29. Power Chords by Mike Krol — Sometimes I think about Record Club as just some fucked up way of journaling my emotions week-to-week. If I write a review every week, then I'll be able to look back and say, damn, that was a good week, or, shit, that was a bad week, and so on. Because that all comes out in how I feel about the music, ya know? So no, I didn't have a good week when Mike Krol rolled around. That wasn't his fault, and maybe I was a little harsh on this album, I dunno. To I think I was being unfair? Not totally, because a better album would've done fucking something to pull me out of the abyss. But could I have found something to hold onto if I wasn't so distracted at the end of last August? Maybe. Sorry, friends.

28. Gliss Riffer by Dan Deacon — It doesn't take much to get my attention. But keeping my attention? That's a different story. Just ask Dan Deacon as he waves from the caboose of a receding train car.

27. The Help Machine by Fastball — Is this album pretty good, or do I just think that because anything is good compared to "The Way"? I guess, gun to my head, I'd say that I'm more impressed than anything, that any band could recover from a disgrace like "The Way" with as much dignity as Fastball did.

26. Transatlanticism by Death Cab for Cutie — Just because I missed the figurative train on this one doesn't mean I can't appreciate it every time I open a glove compartment.

25. Mandatory Fun by "Weird Al" Yankovic — If I win the lottery the first thing I'm gonna do is pay Weird Al a lot of money to remake every song I've ever loved into a polka medley.

24. From Under the Cork Tree by Fall Out Boy — I spent my fair share around what you'd call "emo" this year, and it was very kind of Record Club to allow me the excuse to examine one of the sacred texts.

23. Complacency EP by Johnny Football Hero —

It's so hard to read about music and to be able to tell if you're going to like that music based just on what you read. This is why most RC album pickers defer to choosing known entities, I assume. This is why I often have egg on my face when my reason for picking an album is "this sounds right up my alley" and then it's disappointing.

And this is why I'm a little disappointed with Complacency. I actually really like this EP, but I don't love it. By all accounts, this should've been something I loved. I can't say that truthfully.

What makes the EP work really well is when it gets into the gang vocals thing. I'm thinking the conclusion to "41," and especially the chorus in "Sister Hellen." There's a reason that we all sing along when we're at a concert for one of our favorite bands—it's fun as hell. So when the band is singing along together, that's fun too. Fun for them, fun for us to listen to. And when your EP is only 20-something minutes long, the "fun" aspects of it go a long way.

But so too are the faults magnified, and I'd argue that the first half of the dual title tracks is the big fault here. "Pt. 1" is kinda boring, and sounds suspiciously like Evanescence. Then there's also "Aurora," which never really takes off. Take those tracks off this EP and you have something that gets me REALLY excited to hear what Johnny Football Hero will do in the future. As it stands now, it seems weirdly overstuffed for an EP (Though, sure, "Pt. 2" kinda does leave me wanting more.)

Look, it makes sense, to be a young band and to still be trying to figure out what you want to sound like. Credit to JFH for trying out as many outfits as possible in the short introductory time they have. And no discredit to them if some of those sounds don't work for me personally, because I'm just one guy. I'm sure there are people out there who hate gang vocals and love Evanescence, so what the fuck, man.

GRADE: 3 pukes out of 5

22. to hell with it by PinkPantheress — Like accidentally opening the bathroom door up on a very attractive girl peeing on the toilet—I probably shouldn't have seen that, and I'll probably never speak of it again, but I can't sincerely say that I didn't like what I saw.

21. Not Even Regret by Hidden Things — The good part is the music. The interesting part is the fact that reviewing a Record Club member's uncle's music and then having that member show his uncle the reviews that we wrote about the uncle's music just really threatens to knock this whole fucking house of cards down.

20. A Beginner's Mind by Sufjan Stevens and Angelo De Augustine — Not Sufjan's best work, but he got a lot closer to his best work than he's gotten in over a decade. That's the power of cinema, baby!!!!

19. Oh No by OK Go — Oh yes: the treadmills will live forever.

18. Swords by Nick Lutsko — I still haven't listened to his Spirit Halloween song.

17. Pop? EP by Tierra Whack — Look, I talk a big game about hating the "what genre is this?" conversation, but then a short EP comes around that is built explicitly to start that conversation (and possibly end it), and I'm sucked in. If being a hypocrite lets me ponder some more on Tierra Whack, then so be it.

16. Before These Crowded Streets by Dave Matthews Band — I think it would be too reductive to say that "Dave fans" are annoying. I think it's more interesting than annoying that such a band could become a niche sensation in the first place. I liked this album a lot, and I don't want the fact that some people loved it so much that they would, say, get a DMB tattoo obscure that fact. But it still puzzles me.

15. Purple Haze by Cam'ron — I always feel this pressure to go deep whenever we cover a hip hop album in Record Club. Purple Haze was the one that paid the biggest dividends. Either that, or I'm a quacking chicken.

14. Patience by Mannequin Pussy — "Drunk II" just carries an insane amount of water here. Without it, I'm throwing around words like "boilerplate." With it, I'm melting into a fucking puddle.

13. Sound the People by Red Baraat — I've been to two weddings since reviewing Sound the People. Neither one played Sound the People. Their marriages are doomed.

12. SOUR by Olivia Rodrigo — At the end of the day, it was pretty cool that Record Club was able to flex and put up double digits against one of the most popular albums of the year, and for that album to be one that is actually worth listening to.

11. Watchout! by Martha and the Vandellas — Stephan's grandmother might hate my guts for saying so, but I'll say it anyway: I think Motown music is pretty swell.

10. Walk Through Fire by Yola — Did you know that the album is called "Walk Through Fire" because Yola survived a house fire? Could anyone else make such an obvious metaphor work so goddamn well?

9. Come On Over by Shania Twain — As unfair as the argument is, Shania Twain probably exists as the best argument against Adele's success. Both put up insane numbers relative to their eras, but only one of these women actually have an album that is really really fun. Either Americans had better taste in the '90s, or they just had more money.

8. Lost and Gone Forever by Guster — What is that kid holding in his hand? Is it a turtle? For some reason, I assumed it was a radio. I was picturing it being a tribute to the Say Anything... scene where John Cusack holds up the radio. I imagine Guster doing that same thing for me with Lost and Gone Forever. We want to be yours, Joe, forever. We're the one. Guster is giving me their heart (and I gave them a pen).

7. A Picture of Nectar by Phish — I guess you could apply what I said about DMB to Phish as well, how this is a band who has a rabid core group of fans and then pretty much every other music listener on earth holds them at arm's length because of that. But I don't get the same sense of hostility between parties with Phish. Record Club can dip in and taste a little portion, and meanwhile Phish Heads are pretty much just live and let live. No animosity with anyone involved. Helps that A Picture of Nectar was great.

6. Rumours by Fleetwood Mac — There's literally nothing left to say.

5. Private Dancer by Tina Turner — I don't know if I've ever had such a severe about-face for any artist before. I had my assumptions about Tina Turner, based on nothing. Turner completely shatters those assumptions with Private Dancer, which is about as pure of a rock 'n' roll album as I heard all year, Record Club or otherwise.

4. I Don't Live Here Anymore by the War on Drugs — Okay, okay, enough time has passed. I think we can officially call this WoD's best album. It will be extremely interesting to see if they can keep spinning this particular plate on their next album, but that's a while away. For now, let's just hit play once again.

3. A Trick of the Tail by Genesis — Don't let the various sideshows—boomers going long on classic rock, the debate about live albums, a real alcoholism cloaked by fictional drug use—distract you from the main stage: a rock band in transition, using that transition to create an excellent work of art.

2. Crazy Rhythms by the Feelies — There's value in feeling like you're in on a secret. I should've known about the Feelies, maybe, but the fact is that I didn't, and then after listening to Crazy Rhythms, the question becomes, "Why didn't I know about the Feelies?!" I'm telling you now that this is some good shit, and I'm telling you even though that might be letting the secret out.

1. Long Season by Fishmans — The mysteriousness is the key, I think. I still don't know if I have a firm group on what exactly Fishmans are doing here, but I do know that it intrigues me, and that keeps me listening, and that's what allows me to visit this album every other week or so and discover something new each time. I mean, look, I know that this could describe any good album, and that it's not unique to Long Season. But I do think that, on a certain level, it is unique to Record Club albums. It's tough to digest an album in one single week. Often, by the end of the week, I'm feeling pretty stuffed, and consequentially set that album aside for a while. I didn't feel that way with Long Season. I don't know if I ever will. Not sure if I can come up with higher praise than that.

Following Up with Record Club Alumni: Part 3

As we've done the last two times, we're following up with a handful of Record Club artists who have released new albums since we've covered them in the club. I enlisted some help this time because I thought that would be more fun, but the grades are mine.

The Gate by American Trappist

Released: May 15, 2020

Follow-up to: Tentanda Via, Week 42

Here's Sean E****, who originally picked Tentanda Via way back in 2019 for Record Club. I really only knew that they had followed up on that album because Sean told me about it. The man is a fan of American Trappist. Anyways, here ya go:

"The Gate by American Trappist is one of Joe Michelini's darkest albums to date (the frontman of American Trappist and the former frontman of River City Extension). Having known him growing up as a friend of a friend, this makes me concerned for him. As a fan of his music, I think he has captured our current period of human history in a beautiful way. Listening to this album on Spotify, it has a quietness about it. Listening to it in person, as I did the other week at Johnny Brenda's at the album premier, it can shed that quietness and be very, very loud. I think that is the ideal listening venue for this album—a small, crowded room with the volume on the speakers turned all the way up. That is honestly what we all want right now, isn't it? To be close together and screaming out about our frustrations, disappointments, and pain?"

GRADE: 3.5 pukes out of 5 (no change from previous review; I wasn't at the concert, so all I found was the quiet beauty in The Gate, which hits differently than Tentanda Via, but not in any way worse.)

La Luz by La Luz

Released: October 21, 2021

Follow-up to: Floating Features, Week 5

My original plan was to have Pam help with this one, since she picked the La Luz album for Record Club originally, and I know for a fact that she has listened to this self-titled follow-up. But I tried putting it on and talking to her about it on the same day she got her vaccine booster, and she had very little interest (understandably so, that shit knocks you out). In fact, I'll say that, as far as sick days go, this is kind of an excellent soundtrack. Even more so than Floating Features, La Luz is dark and mysterious. This isn't surf music, this is music for the beach at night, when you can't see the ocean, you can only hear the gentle waves. I recall that the back half of Floating Features, um, featured more of the slower stuff. I'm glad that La Luz is leaning into something, even though I kinda miss more of the surf party tiki shit too.

GRADE: 3 pukes out of 5 (no change from previous review, if only because Floating Features was probably underrated)

Thank You by Diana Ross

Released: November 5, 2021

Follow-up to: diana, Week 74

The gap between the old Diana Ross album we reviewed and the new Diana Ross album that just came out is over 40 years, so it's almost unfair to call Thank You a "follow-up." Ross is 77 years old. Can't really blame her for losing some of the power she had in her youth. Can't really blame her for sticking to the ballads. Can't really blame her that the songs with any noticeable energy also feel like they're trying to soundtrack a Walgreen's commercial. (You can blame her, I guess, for letting Jack Antonoff into the room.) The woman is an institution, and it doesn't seem right to be critical of her septuagenarian work when she has so many classics from way back when.

GRADE: 1.5 pukes out of 5 (-2.5 from previous review)

The Future by Nathaniel Rateliff

Released: November 5, 2021

Follow-up to: And It's Still Alright, Week 108

I made it pretty clear in my And It's Still Alright review (well, as clear as dumb fake medical examination notes can be, anyway) that I thought going solo was a poor decision for Nathaniel Rateliff, and that the dude really only shines with the crackling Night Sweats surrounding him. (This says about as much on the importance of inter-band dynamics as can possibly fit into a three-sentence blurb.) Sure, some of the songs here flirt perilously with a generic alt-rock-radio sound, but still, I can easily ignore it—it's just really good to have the gang back together again.

GRADE: 3.5 pukes out of 5 (+0.5 from previous review)

Last time, I wrote that we only had a few more left, and then like eight RC alumni dropped albums in November. So it looks like we still have at least five more, so maybe I can wrap that up and stay on top of this shit in the new year.

Philly Neighborhoods (II)

I get weirdly upset when people who don't live in Philadelphia pretend like they live in Philadelphia. It's especially egregious in my eyes when the context of that fabrication is that 1) they are a boomer, 2) they participated in white flight in the '90s or '00s, 3) they complain on Facebook that "Philadelphia is dangerous." Bonus points if they mention the name of the District Attorney. Yes, Philadelphia is going to break murder records in 2021, but why is some boomer in Buck County pretending like he cares? You don't even live here, man! (Could be that bootlickers are just doing what they do best and are licking boots, but that's a blog post for another time.)

So I dunno, does having a map of Philadelphia in your Churchville kitchen come off as disingenuous? A little bit! Saying you're "from Philly" is something that you have to earn by continuing to call Philly your home, by contributing to your Philadelphia community, by making Philadelphia better from the inside instead of cutting and running. You can't have a map of Philadelphia in a bathroom that isn't in Philadelphia. The statement it makes rings false in my ears.

In any case, I've seen this "map" a few times, and I try to find my favorite neighborhoods listed on the map, as seen through the eyes of someone who owns a map and is also scared to come to Philadelphia. Here are some of my favorite:

 

Fairkensgate

 

A total up-and-coming neighborhood. Bucks County folk love coming down on Saturdays to get a huge Bavarian soft pretzel at Ben Franklin Hall!

 

Cedarest

 

The Montco elite all agree—Cedarest is much better than Cedar and Cedarier. 

Mount Straw

Get ready to hit up the Men Center and caption your Instagram post with "in the ghetto to see Florida Georgia Line!"

Tacburg

You lived here 25 years ago, "back when it was good" (i.e. back when your block was filled with people who looked exactly like you). The bars just ain't the same.

Boroairy

"My 23-year-old son moved here after he graduated from Millersville. He says the brewery is nice."

Spackerstad

Your parents found out about a nice Italian restaurant here with really good spaghetti served with white wine on the rocks. It's just a shame that the GPS system had to take them through the neighborhoods that it did!

Assy

Stay out of Assy if you stand on the other side of the thin blue line! Lots of old heads of "Italian descent" who are going to beat your ass with a baseball bat if you say anything bad about Christopher Columbus!

*he says, sitting in Fox Chase, which might as well be the suburbs.

Top Ten Record Club Albums from the 2021 Season

submitted by Nate

As in previous years (year?), I'm excluding anything I submitted for observation because clearly my taste is better than anyone else's and frankly it wouldn't be fair or sporting just to sit here and say "damn, what sick music I had people listen to this year," except I sort have already done that here isn't that funny?

Always fun to look back on what we listened to together! I forgot about some of these!

10) Dave Matthews Band — Before These Crowded Streets
9) Slipknot — We Are Not Your Kind
8) Guster — Lost and Gone Forever

Grouping these together less because of anything specific to them as collections of songs or artistic statements or contributions to their genres, and more because these three albums all served in one form or another as wormholes that launched me back to my pre-adolescent days growing up in Western New York. A lot of time was spent shoveling snow, eating cheeseburgers, and playing basketball in my driveway to these bands, and it was a gas to spend a week with them then forget them entirely.

7) Yola — Walk Through Fire

Singer of the year.

6) Jay Electronica — A Written Testimony

The further we move from "Exhibit C," the more it seems impossible that Jay Electronica was ever a going concern as a would-be mainstream rap world-beater, let alone that he could ever fulfill the promise. And yet, it is better to have him than to not, and if the price that must be paid is some dusty Jay-Z raps, I will pay it gladly every time.

5) Cheekface — Emphatically No.

The "person in their 30s having a crisis" aspects of this record are both the selling point and a hindrance because they obfuscate how hooky and sturdy these melodies are. Also, CAKE.

4) Dan Deacon — Gliss Riffer

A welcome addition to the "songs about being on drugs" canon, and a bunch more welcome gravy.

3) The War on Drugs — I Don't Live Here Anymore

Dire Straits wishes they could hoagie mouth like this.

2) Fleetwood Mac — Rumours

All those old people / classic rock radio / Guardians of the Galaxy movies were totally right! Also, for those keeping score, the correct order of operations for Offspring records goes Smash > Ixnay on the Hombre > Americana > Ignition > Splinter > The Offspring > Conspiracy of One > Rise and Fall, Rage and Grace > Days Go By > Let the Bad Times Roll (I assume).

1) Tina Turner — Private Dancer

C O L D  L A W  S T E E L  C L A W.

Song of the Week: "River"

Oh the songs, oh the weeks, the many many weeks

"River"

Joni Mitchell

from Blue

1971

While defending my opinion about Die Hard not being a Christmas movie for reasons I explained last week, I was asked: what about music? What makes a song a "Christmas song"? The answer is both simpler and more complicated than the argument about movies.

It's simpler in that, sure, anything can be a Christmas song. All you need is sleigh bells. Pop that shit on anything, and it becomes a Christmas song. I heard a song by New Found Glory last week called "Ex-Miss" on a "Punk Rock Christmas" Apple playlist. There was nothing about this song that made it sound like anything different than any other New Found Glory song, except for the sleigh bells. There is no question that it's a Christmas song.

So it's simpler in that the qualifications are less strict, with sleigh bells being one example of this. Adding a Christmas tree doesn't necessarily make an action movie a "Christmas movie," but singing about a Christmas tree pretty much guarantees that a song is a "Christmas song."

But it's also more complicated, because cover versions of songs exist, and by covering a song in a certain context, you can change the song's meaning, beyond what the original artist intended. Movies stand by themselves as a piece of work; Die Hard is what it is, and no one can change that. With music, someone can take a song that is not a Christmas song, and then force it to become a Christmas song, and there's nothing anyone can do about it.

The example thrown around the most during my and Pam's arguments about what constitutes Christmas music was Joni Mitchell's "River," which at this point has its reputation as a Christmas song secured, for better or worse. It doesn't even matter that Joni Mitchell certainly did not intend for it to be a Christmas song, or that the word "Christmas" is mentioned once in the first verse and only once more when it repeated in the final verse, and even then the idea of Christmas is far removed from the point that Joni Mitchell is trying to make. It doesn't matter! The song has been covered over 400 times, and most of those covers are on Christmas albums, and so the song is a Christmas song.

This kind of makes me feel weird! Not that I even have a stake in Joni Mitchell fandom—Blue is in Pam's Top Ten All Time, I think it's just okay—so like I don't feel the need to "defend" the integrity of her craft or anything. But the idea of misinterpreting an artist's intentions for commercial gain just kind of makes me feel a little icky. By singing "River" at Christmas, you are killing the author.

I suppose it helps that it's a good song. The same argument cannot be made for "Hallelujah," a shitty song by any artist—Leonard Cohen, Jeff Buckley, Shrek, doesn't matter—that has in recent years been entered into the Christmas canon on the backs of the Pentatonix, who are terrible. I join the fight against the claim that "Hallelujah" is a Christmas song, because 1) it's not, 2) it doesn't mention Christmas or take place on Christmas or feature any signature Christmas sound like sleigh bells or glockenspiels, 3) it's a bad song, and so why should I be forced to hear it during the best time of year?

If I'm making that argument, though, we'd have to consider that any song could be a Christmas song if we wanted it to be. Add sleigh bells to "Sister Jack" by Spoon, and bam, it's a Christmas song. Change the holiday on "Casimir Pulaski Day" Sufjan Stevens and pop it on a Christmas covers playlist. Shit, man, why didn't Kelly Clarkson sing "Since U Been Gone" but make it "Since You Been Good" and make it about Santa's Naughty List and include it on When Christmas Comes Around...? Anything is possible when the boundaries surrounding the Christmas music genre come tumbling down.

As with the Die Hard argument, I concede to the fact that none of this is all that important. It's not like I'm getting upset when I hear "River" in December. Whatever it takes to get through the holidays, man. Speaking of which: Christmas is officially over. Hope y'all had a good one. The "Christmas music" argument is officially retired for the season, and is packed away in the cellar, along with the decorations and the fake tree. Time to pull out the next argument: What makes an "Easter song"? Is "The Night They Drove Ol' Dixie Down" the best Easter song of all time? Let's chat.

Album of the Week: Complacency

We made it through another year. Thanks to all those who stuck with us through the past 52 weeks. There are some big plans in the works for Record Club 2022, so stand by. In the meantime, here's another EP to check out. Listen to the playlist, check out the archives, or continue below.

WEEK 152 — December 26, 2021-January 1, 2022

What we're listening to this week (Joe's pick):

ALBUM: Complacency EP

ARTIST: Johnny Football Hero

RELEASED: July 16, 2021

WHAT GENRE IS THIS: Bandcamp gives us alternative, emo, pop punk, post hardcore (yikes!), punk, and swancore(???)

WHY JOE PICKED IT: BrooklynVegan had this listed on their Best Punk Albums of 2021 list, which is usually the only list each year that I comb through and actually find worthy albums that I missed that year. They made 'em sound like it would be right up my alley as far as sound goes, plus JFH recorded right over there in Roxborough, Philadelphia.

TRACKLIST:

1. Cap'n Obvious (Deficit)
2. 41
3. Complacency Pt. 1
4. Sister Hellen
5. Aurora
6. Complacency Pt. 2

LENGTH: 25:40

 

WHERE TO LISTEN FOR FREE: Bandcamp

 

READING SOME SHIT: A decent Q&A with the band on Dear Untitled.

PREVIOUSLY ON RECORD CLUB: There's the Philly thing—Johnny Football Hero aren't the first Philadelphia artist in Record Club. But there's also the sports thing. Between Fastball and Free Throw, we had a decent amount of sports-related band names this year. What's next? Tennis? American Football? The Goalie's Anxiety at the Penalty Kick?

Happy listening, fam! Have a great rest of the year!

Merry Christmas, and as Always, We Are Closed

Whatever holiday you're celebrating today, I hope you have a happy one. If you aren't celebrating a holiday, then I hope you enjoy your takeout food and rented movie. Regardless of what you have to be thankful for, I will personally be thankful if no wayward souls find their way to the blog today, December 25th. You should be doing anything else besides reading Puke on Your Birthday. Literally anything. Go make yourself useful somewhere.

Still here? I warned you, but okay. Last year I was doing a similar blog-every-day thing, and used December 25th as an excuse to very briefly look back at some of the best (and worst) that PoYB had to offer this year. There are some pats on the back here, for sure, hence the posting of it on the biggest holiday of the year. You can skip this. I'm just vamping for time.

Puke on Your Birthday's 2021 Superlatives

Highest Amount-of-Effort-to-Number-of-People-Who-Actually-Read-It Ratio: Buckethead's Discography, Ranked

This really might be peak "I thought it was a good idea at the time but the more hours I worked on it the more I realized it was a terrible idea but I adhere to the Sunk Cost Fallacy" for Puke on Your Birthday.

 

Most Even Amount-of-Effort-to-Number-of-People-Who-Actually-Read-It Ratio: The Duke Nukem Album of the Week Writeup 

Unlike the Buckethead thing, this "WHY JOE PICKED IT" was so dumb that it pushed past dumb, past absurd, and came all the way back around to "people are texting me about how stupid it was," which is all I ever wanted.

Most I-Don't-Care-How-Many-People-Read-This-It-Was-Still-Kinda-Fun-Splicing-Audio-and-Video-Together Ratio: Lip Sync for Your Life!!!!

But now I can't hear the Hotelier's "Life in Drag" without thinking about Laganja Estranja.

Most Passionate Song of the Week: "Zombie" by Fela Kuti

Joe Biden is fucking useless.

Most Disappointing Failure: I was not able to bet on the Floyd Mayweather Jr. vs. Logan Paul fight

Look, I stand by the fact that there was no way Logan Paul was going to win. You knew it, I knew it. Unfortunately, the bookies knew it too, and didn't open up bets at all (maybe they read Puke on Your Birthday). Shame, because I could've risked like $8,000 to win a cool $500.

 

Best Funeral: I finally put to rest that stupid Don't Tell Me What I Can't Do column 

It was always dumb, and it felt really fucking good to flush that shit out of my system and never look back.

Most I Made Myself Laugh: The return of the short-lived On Humor column

Anti-humor will never not be funny to me. I realize that I am the only one laughing.

Most Surprising PoYB Contributor: Alex Bleeker, the bassist of Real Estate

A lot of great folks added their thoughts and feelings to the webpages of Puke on Your Birthday this year, but none weirder than one half of the rhythm section of a B-list indie rock band.

Favorite List: Things I'm to throw at a basketball player whose name I already forget because I don't follow the NBA very closely but it seemed fun at the time

Man, it's been a long fucking year.

Most Sloppy Blotto Emo Post: The annual "I should really cut down on my drinking" post

Written drunkenly, I'm certain. I really did cut down on my drinking once I started to attend school, but based on the amount of drinking I was doing this past summer, I don't think I deserve any applause.

Best Harry Potter Post: Hagrid Is Not a Death Eater

I somehow restrained myself from going after everyone's least favorite TERF and stuck to the scapegoat at hand: the internet idiots who think Hagrid is a Death Eater.

Best Attempt at Getting Jimmy Fallon Cancelled: The "Please Cancel Jimmy Fallon" post

For real, the dude invited the teenage president of his fan club to the set of SNL and served her up to his buddy Horatio Sanz to be molested. Yo Fallon, if you visit PA, I'm sicking DHS on your ass.

Best Wrote-a-Blog-Post-in-Ten-Minutes Blog Post: The Coco bullshit

Since starting back on the blog-a-day thing, I'm always looking for stupid ideas that'll take less than fifteen minutes of typing. Hit me up if you have an idea that fits the PoYB aesthetic. 

Worst Theme Week: Ratatouille Week

I mean, yeah, I'm always looking for ways to type out a ten-minute blog post, but not like this. Not like this.

Longest Non-Buckethead Blog Post (Which Was 17,009 Words): The Rumours Review

Which was 7,262 words. But a lot of it was self-referential Record Club inside jokes, so I can understand if you didn't read it.

Best Reason That I Won't Ever Get Therapy Probably: Blogging About Childhood Trauma Involving Visors

Shout out to Mr. Griffin, hope you're still out there somewhere.

Best Mystery: What Da Babies Gonna Do?

I guess we'll never know what they are gonna do.

Best Oh-Shit-It's-5-AM-and-I'm-Leaving-for-Work-in-a-Half-Hour-and-I-Haven't-Written-a-Blog-Post-Yet-So-What-Bullshit-Can-I-Literally-Throw-Together-in-Like-Twenty-Minutes-During-Breakfast-to-Fulfill-This-Insanely-Dumb-Blog-a-Day-Mandate Blog Post: the art of Infinite Jest

Sunny is literally the only person I know in real life who has read Infinite Jest, so at least there was one person who read it / didn't hate it.

Best Nostalgia Exercise, Which Is Saying Something Because This is Puke on Your Birthday and We Traffic in Nostalgia Here: The McNally's post

Wobble baby.

Biggest PoYB Meta News: PoYB retires the Mission Statement

Life is a series of greetings and partings.

Biggest PoYB News: Charlie Watts Is Dead (Part 1, Part 2)

Hey, did I ever tell you about how much I dislike Charlie Watts, the former drummer of the Rolling Stones? Well, he's dead now. See you in hell, old buddy.

Pop?, Pam

How refreshing to listen to three consecutive songs from an artist and be completely entertained for every second of those eight minutes. Pop? is exhilarating. It demonstrates Tierra Whack's absolute proficiency as not only an artist who can pack a punch into every line, but one who doesn't need to add songs just to add songs—maybe the opposite of our dear Record Club's Christmas albums, as evidenced by last week's reviews. I'm sure there's, like, a reason behind EPs vs LPs that I'm missing, or just don't know about, but for now I'm choosing to believe it was all a choice.

Each and every song on Pop?—each and every second really—is authentic and fresh, which sounds like I'm describing a farm-to-table restaurant. Thing is, Tierra Whack's farm-to-table is the real deal. None of that "Center City type restaurant" BS that everyone loves to tout up here in the semi-suburbia paradise the K***s call home. Places marketed as authentic but are really just corporate cookie cutter nonsense with some rustic paint and a "farm fresh eggs" sign. Places where anything remotely authentic was likely removed in order to create the hand-tailored color beige of dining experiences. You know the ones I mean.

No, Tierra Whack is not only really great at what she does, but she is so weird and silly at times that it just makes me appreciate her not only as an artist but a person. There is definitely only one Tierra Whack. "Body of Water" is an absolute killer song that does not relent. "Lazy" made me laugh so hard and, I think, rivals TLC's classic "No Scrubs" in its takedown of, well, a scrub. When the third and final song ("Dolly") started, I honestly thought we had shuffled to, like, Sufjan or someone. Obviously Tierra Whack is showcasing her range here, with a beautiful introspective song.

Great EP. Thumbs up. Ketchup. Mustard.

Pop?, Sunny

Is Pop? "Pop"?

Consider Pop? is the set represented by P' and the greater notion of "Pop" by the set P. We will show P' ⊆ P.

We are given that B ∪ L ∪ D ⊆ P, where B, L, and D are the sets representing "Body of Water," "Lazy," and "Dolly."

I postulate through empirical observation that for any random communicable section x ∈ B, x ∈ E where E is the set representing "Pop, Electronic". Similarly, for any random y ∈ L and z ∈ D, y ∈ R and z ∈ F where R and F represent the sets "Pop, Rock" and "Pop, Indie/Folk" respectively.

Per definition E ∪ R ∪ F ⊆ P.

Therefore, since any randomly selected point within the union set (B ∪ L ∪ D), which is a subset of P', can be found within the union set (E ∪ R ∪ F), which is a subset of P itself, we can conclude P' ⊆ P

C- for the proof, something's off. B-ish for the music. Three slightly odd songs (maybe the point?) that are surprisingly catchy. The experiments in musical form with a consistent through-line makes a fun little sub-ten-minute EP.

Pop?, Nate

Three unanswerable questions regarding Pop?:

1) When the decision was made to lift that crisp, arresting snare drum straight off of one of the most kinetic, powerful, enduring rap songs of the last 30 years, did Tierra Whack already have her verse written, or did she realize the need to rise to the occasion once she discovered she would be touching the monolith?

2) Are we, as a culture, not recognizing the important contributions of Lenny Kravitz (outside of scarves and showing one's dick via splitting leather pants)? [Editor's note: Nate has implored me to find the gif and link to it here. NSFW!!!!]

3) Why did this EP come so late as to effectively limit my ability to include "Dolly" on my year-end best songs list, even though I technically have not written a list and may not ever? Follow-up question, what is wrong with me?

This EP rules.

Pop?, Joe

The title asks a question: Pop? Over the next twelve hours, I will listen to Pop? on repeat. At eight minutes and 23 seconds, this means that I will get through it 81 times (with an extra seven minutes and 25 seconds left over, to be used for bathroom breaks and for plugging in the iPod if it needs recharging). Each time it starts back from the beginning, I will ask a question of my own. Pop? You tell me, Tierra Whack.

1. Is this what pop is supposed to sound like?
2. Do I like pop?
3. How many times am I going to make this the central question of a Record Club pop album?
4. What's Tierra Whack's deal?
5. She did that whole fifteen one-minute raps songs for her last album, right?
6. Remember when there was a Tierra Whack billboard on I-95 for like ten months?
7. If this is her version of pop, then what is her version of rap like?
8. Are we getting that in "Body of Water"?
9. This is pretty good rapping, right?
10. I mean, I still don't know what makes someone good at rap—is it being able to rap fast?
11. Is it being able to change your cadence to keep things fresh?
12. Is it the quality of the rhymes?
13. Is it being able to duet with a dolphin?
14. What's up with that dolphin sound effect?
15. That's an inside joke that I'm not supposed to know about, right?
16. Doesn't this sound like an OutKast production?
17. Does "Hey Yeah" make it that every high tempo rap-pop hybrid will sound like OutKast for the rest of eternity?
18. Did "Body of Water" almost get moved to the Rap? EP?
19. Is "Lazy" the most "pop" of the three songs of Pop??
20. Again—what makes something "pop music"?
21. It can't be the guitar riff, because barely any of the popular music these days features a guitar like this, right?
22. Is it the autotune?
23. Is the autotune kind of annoying?
24. Or does it work the more you listen to it?
25. I never know if this is an ignorant question to ask: does the use of autotune constitute an admission by the autotuner that he/she/they cannot actually sing?
26. Who else had "you lied you lied you lied you lied, GO!" in their head all week?
27. Is "Lazy" so good because it's a fun flex about how hard Tierra Whack has worked to get here?
28. Or is it secretly toxic because it valorizes the hustle culture, a culture that fits snuggly within the contexts of late stage capitalism?
29. Or am I reading this too deeply?
30. Or should I consider this a manifesto on the type of person Tierra Whack wants to date, and understand that I would have absolutely no say in that whatsoever?
31. Was it wrong to play this in front of my kids so many times, with so many N-words?
32. There's no way they are picking up on individual words in any of these songs at their age, right?
33. Is Tierra Whack's Pop? going to be the catalyst for having the race talk with my daughters?
34. Are there any bookstores open today so that I can buy them Ibram X. Kendi's children's book?
35. So "Dolly" is a reference to Dolly Parton, right? Or did I get that wrong last Sunday?
36. I guess this sounds kind of country-ish, right?
37. Isn't it interesting how the Pop? EP basically has a rap song, a rock song, and a country song?
38. Is that saying more about pop music than Tierra Whack intended?
39. I wonder if any of the songs on the Rap? or R&B? EPs are pushing the boundaries of their respective genre?
40. I wonder if this genre-pushing is a feature exclusive to pop music?
41. Or should I just go ahead and download this jazz emo album?
42. Alright, so "Dolly" is the worst song on the EP, right?
43. Is that one of the downfalls of putting out a three-song EP?
44. That the flaws are magnified because it's so short?
45. Or is "Dolly" just okay, and its flaws are magnified because it's stuck after "Body of Water" and "Lazy"?
46. Is Dolly Parton boring?
47. What would Dolly Parton think about Tierra Whack?
48. Who is more likely to be rescued by Dolly Parton from getting hit by a car, Tierra Whack or Jetty Bones?
49. Should Whack have put "Dolly" in between "Body of Water" and "Lazy" so that she can end on a high note?
50. Should she have even split these three EPs up in the first place?
51. Wouldn't it have been better to combine all nine songs into one great LP (even though if that were the case she wouldn't be eligible for EP week in Record Club)?
52. Is it because she is afraid of genre-hopping?
53. Is she scared of being too good at too much?
54. Does she not want to show us her full self?
55. Is she trying to be mysterious on purpose?
56. Will she ever release more than an average of five minutes of new music per year?
57. Why do we continue to do this EP thing?
58. Is it even worth reviewing albums this short?
59. Especially when each one is explicitly billed as only a piece of the larger puzzle?
60. Is anyone reading this review on Christmas Eve?
61. Did blogging get in the way of wrapping Christmas presents this year?
62. Should I have eschewed the numbered list conceit in favor of a short paragraph so I could've had more time to get holiday-related errands done?
63. What the fuck is up with the turtle mascot on the cover?
64. Why the broken heart, Mr. Turtle?
65. Are you missing loved ones during this Christmas season?
66. Could this album be a Christmas album?
67. Do I feel uncomfortable with "Lazy" because I myself am lazy?
68. Does Pam feel this way about me?
69. Are those feelings magnified during the holiday season, when I tend to wait until the last minute to buy family gifts, and then only do the bare minimum?
70. Is Pappy going to like the belt I bought him?!
71. Would Pappy like Tierra Whack?
72. Would anyone in my family enjoy Tierra Whack?
73. Should I play Pop? when we host Christmas dinner?
74. How many scoops of homemade stuffing and gravy can I eat in eight minutes and 23 seconds?
75. Do you think I should check out Whack World based on my overall positive impressions of Pop??
76. Or am I going to be disappointed because Pop? is purposefully set apart from her 2018 debut album, genre- and sound-wise?
77. Isn't that what we ask of any artist, to grow and change and try to present something new?
78. Should we not applaud Tierra Whack for doing something different?
79. Should we not do what we always do for EPs, and that is consider them harbingers of the future, that we may get but a brief glimpse of where this artist is heading, and whether we should be excited for that hypothetical future, whenever it should decide to arrive?
80. What is pop?
81. Is it Pop??
    

GRADE: 3 pukes out of 5

A Tale for Every Tree

There are two types of Christmas trees. The first kind are stately and meticulously dressed. Every bulb and every ball is exactly in its place to create maximum holiday glow. The second kind of Christmas tree is haphazardly decorated with a bunch of homemade trash and knickknacks. Rather than projecting a bright present tense, they are instead a vessel into the past. It looks silly, adorn with junk, but it's also warm with nostalgia.

I probably don't need to tell you which type of tree we have. (In fact, does that first type of tree even exist in households such as ours? Or did I just create a strawman for the introductory paragraph?) Every ornament tells a story. Here are six such (very short) stories from the K*** family Christmas tree.

When I say that we have "junk" on our tree, I'm really just self-deprecating. Yes, this ornament is, in the literal sense, junk. It's a painted popsicle stick, and it's falling apart. But the number "'96" on the back means that I made this piece of junk exactly 25 years ago, and it has somehow survived. That means something. I don't know what exactly it means, but it means something.

Of course, not every piece of trash is another man's treasure. Consider, if you will, the latest addition to the K*** family Christmas tree. We went to get a picture with a reindeer a couple weeks ago. It was a good picture, but man, did this fucking thing reek of taking advantage of the FOMO'd. $20 per person, plus a cover charge, plus a mandatory $5 extra for the kids because of "arts and crafts," which ended up being a bunch of stickers you could have your three-year-old place on a cheap dusty Christmas ornament. You bet your ass we made the kids put together Christmas ornaments in the arts and crafts tent. You bet your ass that we will be dragged along to this kind of bullshit by our families for the rest of all our lives.

But who knows, maybe we'll cherish that dumb overpriced ornament a few years from now. Some ornaments become more relevant over time. Take, for instance, this Pepsi ornament. My friends and I, in early grade school, for some reason thought it was important to drink Pepsi instead of Coca-Cola. It was just cooler to do so. Don't ask me why. But so that's how I ended up with a Pepsi ornament in the '90s. Many years into the future, my sister meets and eventually marries Bob, who... works for Coca-Cola. I don't know if this particular ornament would've made the journey over the decades if it weren't another means of busting Bobby's balls.

Some ornaments are able to maintain their relevancy, whether anyone thinks they actually should or not. Check out this ornament from last year, gifted in La Salle Friends' ornament exchange last year by PoYB contributor Bridget. Dua Lipa's Future Nostalgia was her Record Club pick last year, and she probably felt that the rest of the reviewers underrated it, hence the joke ornament gift. But is it a joke? At least one song from Future Nostalgia has been in the Top 40 for almost three years now, so you tell me who's laughing. (And sure, I underrated the album at the time, I'll admit it.)

A small box of ornaments made their way from Rockledge to Port Richmond when Pam and I bought our first house. Mostly random shit that me and my sisters used to put up on the tree in our youths (see: the Pepsi ornament). However, a select few actually were "precious" in the nostalgic sense of the word. See, for instance, an ornament that was placed on the tree for me when I was born. Can't get more nostalgic then that.

Or can you? Because I don't remember being born, but I sure as shit remember drinking 10,000 Hamm's Special Lights. A few people have gifted me Hamm's stars over the years, but Pam is the only one who has given me an HSL star specifically. If you'll allow me one brief moment to get sentimental over a cheap beer: a star made from a Hamm's Special Light can offers us a deeper window into a past that does not exist any longer. Hamm's Special Light is no longer produced. I will never and can never drink another HSL for the rest of my life. This ornament is all I have left from all the great times we had drinking it.

 

I know this sounds silly, because it's a goddamn beer (and, let's be real, Hamm's Premium tastes pretty similar). But the same could be said for all of these ornaments. I'll never be so innocent as to make a popsicle stick snowman for mommy ever again. Willow will never be this young again. I haven't seen my Pepsi friends in years. Some music will never seem the same after that brief window when it's fresh and new. I'm possibly closer to death than to birth at this point.

So if a Christmas tree really is yet another excuse to get all misty-eyed and nostalgic, then I am never more nostalgic than I am around Christmastime.