Pop?, Joe

The title asks a question: Pop? Over the next twelve hours, I will listen to Pop? on repeat. At eight minutes and 23 seconds, this means that I will get through it 81 times (with an extra seven minutes and 25 seconds left over, to be used for bathroom breaks and for plugging in the iPod if it needs recharging). Each time it starts back from the beginning, I will ask a question of my own. Pop? You tell me, Tierra Whack.

1. Is this what pop is supposed to sound like?
2. Do I like pop?
3. How many times am I going to make this the central question of a Record Club pop album?
4. What's Tierra Whack's deal?
5. She did that whole fifteen one-minute raps songs for her last album, right?
6. Remember when there was a Tierra Whack billboard on I-95 for like ten months?
7. If this is her version of pop, then what is her version of rap like?
8. Are we getting that in "Body of Water"?
9. This is pretty good rapping, right?
10. I mean, I still don't know what makes someone good at rap—is it being able to rap fast?
11. Is it being able to change your cadence to keep things fresh?
12. Is it the quality of the rhymes?
13. Is it being able to duet with a dolphin?
14. What's up with that dolphin sound effect?
15. That's an inside joke that I'm not supposed to know about, right?
16. Doesn't this sound like an OutKast production?
17. Does "Hey Yeah" make it that every high tempo rap-pop hybrid will sound like OutKast for the rest of eternity?
18. Did "Body of Water" almost get moved to the Rap? EP?
19. Is "Lazy" the most "pop" of the three songs of Pop??
20. Again—what makes something "pop music"?
21. It can't be the guitar riff, because barely any of the popular music these days features a guitar like this, right?
22. Is it the autotune?
23. Is the autotune kind of annoying?
24. Or does it work the more you listen to it?
25. I never know if this is an ignorant question to ask: does the use of autotune constitute an admission by the autotuner that he/she/they cannot actually sing?
26. Who else had "you lied you lied you lied you lied, GO!" in their head all week?
27. Is "Lazy" so good because it's a fun flex about how hard Tierra Whack has worked to get here?
28. Or is it secretly toxic because it valorizes the hustle culture, a culture that fits snuggly within the contexts of late stage capitalism?
29. Or am I reading this too deeply?
30. Or should I consider this a manifesto on the type of person Tierra Whack wants to date, and understand that I would have absolutely no say in that whatsoever?
31. Was it wrong to play this in front of my kids so many times, with so many N-words?
32. There's no way they are picking up on individual words in any of these songs at their age, right?
33. Is Tierra Whack's Pop? going to be the catalyst for having the race talk with my daughters?
34. Are there any bookstores open today so that I can buy them Ibram X. Kendi's children's book?
35. So "Dolly" is a reference to Dolly Parton, right? Or did I get that wrong last Sunday?
36. I guess this sounds kind of country-ish, right?
37. Isn't it interesting how the Pop? EP basically has a rap song, a rock song, and a country song?
38. Is that saying more about pop music than Tierra Whack intended?
39. I wonder if any of the songs on the Rap? or R&B? EPs are pushing the boundaries of their respective genre?
40. I wonder if this genre-pushing is a feature exclusive to pop music?
41. Or should I just go ahead and download this jazz emo album?
42. Alright, so "Dolly" is the worst song on the EP, right?
43. Is that one of the downfalls of putting out a three-song EP?
44. That the flaws are magnified because it's so short?
45. Or is "Dolly" just okay, and its flaws are magnified because it's stuck after "Body of Water" and "Lazy"?
46. Is Dolly Parton boring?
47. What would Dolly Parton think about Tierra Whack?
48. Who is more likely to be rescued by Dolly Parton from getting hit by a car, Tierra Whack or Jetty Bones?
49. Should Whack have put "Dolly" in between "Body of Water" and "Lazy" so that she can end on a high note?
50. Should she have even split these three EPs up in the first place?
51. Wouldn't it have been better to combine all nine songs into one great LP (even though if that were the case she wouldn't be eligible for EP week in Record Club)?
52. Is it because she is afraid of genre-hopping?
53. Is she scared of being too good at too much?
54. Does she not want to show us her full self?
55. Is she trying to be mysterious on purpose?
56. Will she ever release more than an average of five minutes of new music per year?
57. Why do we continue to do this EP thing?
58. Is it even worth reviewing albums this short?
59. Especially when each one is explicitly billed as only a piece of the larger puzzle?
60. Is anyone reading this review on Christmas Eve?
61. Did blogging get in the way of wrapping Christmas presents this year?
62. Should I have eschewed the numbered list conceit in favor of a short paragraph so I could've had more time to get holiday-related errands done?
63. What the fuck is up with the turtle mascot on the cover?
64. Why the broken heart, Mr. Turtle?
65. Are you missing loved ones during this Christmas season?
66. Could this album be a Christmas album?
67. Do I feel uncomfortable with "Lazy" because I myself am lazy?
68. Does Pam feel this way about me?
69. Are those feelings magnified during the holiday season, when I tend to wait until the last minute to buy family gifts, and then only do the bare minimum?
70. Is Pappy going to like the belt I bought him?!
71. Would Pappy like Tierra Whack?
72. Would anyone in my family enjoy Tierra Whack?
73. Should I play Pop? when we host Christmas dinner?
74. How many scoops of homemade stuffing and gravy can I eat in eight minutes and 23 seconds?
75. Do you think I should check out Whack World based on my overall positive impressions of Pop??
76. Or am I going to be disappointed because Pop? is purposefully set apart from her 2018 debut album, genre- and sound-wise?
77. Isn't that what we ask of any artist, to grow and change and try to present something new?
78. Should we not applaud Tierra Whack for doing something different?
79. Should we not do what we always do for EPs, and that is consider them harbingers of the future, that we may get but a brief glimpse of where this artist is heading, and whether we should be excited for that hypothetical future, whenever it should decide to arrive?
80. What is pop?
81. Is it Pop??
    

GRADE: 3 pukes out of 5