Held Accountable — Day 3

I get worried about the aches and pains. For some reason, the idea of Lyme disease has really bothered me recently. It's like the eight- or ninth-most likely answer for why my joints have been hurting so badly recently, but still, I just get worried. I wake up every morning pretty stiff in the feet and ankles and knees.

What it probably is (not Lyme disease) is spending a regular amount of time from November to April building muscle at the gym, and then spending two weeks letting those muscles tighten up, exacerbated by the allergies swelling joints and whatnot. I went to the gym this morning, and ran on the treadmill for the first time in a while. Just a mile. From a quarter mile to three-quarters of a mile, my right leg was in pretty intense pain (a stiffness pain). But after I broke past that, it felt fine. So it went for most of the parts of the body. To me, that proves the stiffness hypothesis, that I just need to stay loose.

I know I said yesterday that I'm focusing on weight loss, and that weight loss starts in the kitchen, not the gym. But I still get worried. I want to be mobile. I want to feel better, not worse. I want to gain strength, not fuck with it.

I think I just need to be patient with the process. That's where I'm at. Patient. Day 3 went smoothly, more or less. Not every day will. But as long as most days are mostly good, then I'll see the progress. Slowly, slowly.