This album would be playing in a store I accidentally wandered into where the salesperson immediately asks “can I help you?” as I quickly stammer out “ha ha no thank you just looking!” knowing I’d be purchasing absolutely nothing there.
Having said that I’m glad there is still a space for music that pairs well with wind chimes, and I do appreciate the irony of singing “1998 is calling” on “Story of My Life” (which would’ve been better if it was spelled like Thnks fr th Mmrs.)
Unfortunately I will have to deduct half a point at the camera clicks on “Photo of You” for making me think I accidentally took a screenshot on my phone, but I will give that same half point back for naming your record ESSENTIALS in a matrix porn font. Also the club mix of “Intimate” at the end sounds like the beginning to a SSX Tricky level so it’s safe to assume Erika de Casier is also a gamer.
2 out of 5 Pukes.
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