Blame My Ex, Beth

As described in my blurb, Blame My Ex has been on heavy rotation for me because there is nothing that I love more than a breakup album. There's usually something both fun and heartbreaking about them, and I eat that combination right up.

There are really no skips for me because the album arrangement transitions really well through the various emotional stages with each track. As I started to think about how I wanted to review it, I figured I'd just go right ahead and take us on a hero's journey song by song because why not. Be prepared for probably way too many personal details.

"Blame Brett" kicks the journey off with bold confidence that no one will break your heart again, you're just ready for a good time, and who can blame you? I am merely Frankenstein's monster, my ex is the one who created the mess.

"What Doesn't Kill You Makes You Paranoid" documents the phase where you start questioning if you're just a mess and not in a hot and fun way. Flings with actors and tall boys on the Raptors are probably good for instant gratification but, unfortunately, will not help assuage the personal doubts of your own self-worth. Have I ever related to a lyric more than this one: "I think I'm becoming some kind of validation fiend, cut my hair 'causе I needed a fix of an acquaintance's compliments"? Absolutely not, I am an attention hound. I'm learning, I'm growing, I'm just a 35-year-old teenage girl.

Part of that growth is overcoming your inner saboteur to recognize your own worth instead of blaming yourself for someone else's shortfalls. "Me & Me" reclaims that self-assurance while also saying "fuck you" to anyone who sees being single as some spinster trope ("Sеxy in the city, save your pity, bitch"). This isn't to say that running solo is always a blast and a half. No! Sometimes you find yourself in an existential crisis and "Everything Is Boring" really captures that ennui.

The boredom eventually bothers you enough that you force yourself back into action, literally and figuratively. "My Body ft Your Lips" is one of my favorite tracks because it's a sexy song that reflects on the fun of meeting and being physical with someone new. You always need one song that's just a little naaaasty and this one hits.

"Kismet" really celebrates the delusion that every interaction with a new love interest is fate itself. This song is basically a recent Reductress post: "Woman Only Reads Horoscopes When She Has a Crush." Dear readers, I am this woman.

"Shower Beer" is the most fun song on the album while also being the most disjointed from the overall breakup arc. That checks, since this was the only song that the lead singer wrote while she was still in her relationship. Lighthearted and fun, it' a refreshing cleanser before the album becomes a bit more reflective.

"Edge of the Earth" feels the most romantic as it details the passion and addiction of a relationship, for better or worse.

"If a Tree Falls" is my favorite track because I am a sad girl at my core, and this highlights the devastation of a relationship dissolving. Despite various distractions, there's a limited time where you can fool yourself into believing that you're fine. It would be great to live in blissful ignorance forever but, unfortunately, the tree does eventually fall and it honestly just fucking sucks ("Yeah, I heard it, and I hate that I did, now I'm hurting"). It's a perfect penultimate song because it makes you reckon with tough feelings, but it hints that this won't be the end all be all for you.

"Cigarette" is the culmination of the heart's cycle as it begins again with a new obsession. This song is flirty and horny and aptly named as the album's satisfying finisher.

Overall, the Beaches put out a fun album that I've enjoyed immensely. It was also a treat to review, and I hope that you all enjoyed it as well. Here's hoping the hazing isn't too harsh!