From 2005-2008, I frequently wrote public diary entries on Xanga, and it was bad. I still have a copy of it. Some of it is so emo that it hurts. But I'll let you be the judge of that, because here is exactly one sentence from every xanga entry I ever wrote, presented without context.
~~~~~~~~~~
3/19/05 "But the phoenix has risen from the ashes..."
3/22/05 "School was complete and utter shit, although by saying 'school,' 'shit' is inevitable."
3/24/05 "I feel Mr. Bush is being extremely hypocritical: 'Every life is sacred,' well, except for those 100,000 Iraqis, but who's counting?"
3/25/05 "Parents don't trust kids anymore, well not me anyway."
3/26/05 "I'm not gonna stop hanging out with you just because you drink, just don't expect me to drink with you."
3/27/05 "Usually I hate that southern twang crap, but the Band just presents it in such a wonderful way."
3/29/05 "All questions will be answered completely and truthfully, you have my word."
3/30/05 "Hahaha, pulled it off baby... it was an awesome night."
4/1/05 "Are you now, or have you ever been, a blueberry muffin?"
4/2/05 "And sorry to everyone on AIM."
4/5/05 "We got off school on Friday for his funeral, thank you Lord."
4/8/05 "Let's all cross our fingers and hope that our plans Saturday night go according to plan, lest you may just be reading about it in Rockledge's newspaper."
4/8/05 (later) "And Cory was just lying on the floor, eating cheese puffs and talking to himself, so I went home."
4/10/05 "Joe Green wasn't with us, but we got a message from Christian, saying that him and Joe had weapons, guns and the like, and were gonna kill some kid who was chasing after them, something like that... it was not cool."
4/12/05 "Ponder for a moment all those books that were cut out of the final version of the Bible."
4/14/05 "I fucking owned all my tests this week, including Spanish, Pre-Calc, and two Frankenstein tests, for which I didn't even read the book but still aced."
4/16/05 "Then, get this, some kid calls my cell when I'm in the car with my dad, he said his name was 'Skunk,' and at first I thought it was a wrong number, but then he says, 'I'm calling regarding your friend Joe Green... tell him I'm gonna kick his motherfucking ass...' so I hung up."
4/18/05 "So me and my pops went to Baltimore yesterday, and the first thing he says to me when we get in the car: 'Are you doing crack cocaine?'"
4/20/05 "Some kids celebrated this holiday in probably the dumbest way possible by smoking a joint outside of school, and well, they got suspended."
4/23/05 "'I can punch you through a window right now.'"
4/26/05 "The catch: he was playing guitar at a little thing called 'JesusFest.'"
4/30/05 "I turn on the light to my bedroom, and find urine all over my Bio textbook and folder."
5/1/05 "And if you know Andrew, you could have probably guessed that he agreed; we get off the monorail, and he wears a hat full of chocolate smoothie."
5/3/05 "I keep forgetting to tell you guys, but it seems that a topic at a previous Home and School meeting at Presentation B.V.M. was none other than... my xanga."
5/5/05 "There wasn't a big hoopla or anything, but they are having a baby so I guess they thought that they had to get married sooner than later."
5/7/05 "I couldn't give less of a shit if you can play a fucking flam-tappa-diddlediddle-rammaflam, if you can't keep a simple beat then you suck as a drummer."
5/8/05 "All milfs are welcome to stop by my house for a special Mother's Day gift if they want to."
5/10/05 "I suppose there have been a few good things happening, but not much."
5/12/05 "I'm in the bathroom, and I hear these two drunk doofuses in the stalls, and one of the guys chuckles and says, 'duuuuuuude, I just dropped the camera in the toilet!'"
5/14/05 "And I know what song I'm gonna sing for my audition too, just picked it today—'Golden Ticket' from Willy Wonka."
5/15/05 "Okay, so I was dumb enough to miss the train."
5/16/05 "I sit in the back of the room, I do nothing, I sleep, I make fun of myself and the people around me, I laugh constantly, and yet, somehow, still pass the class."
5/17/05 "It is my true belief that this famous poem by Robert Frost is about drugs..."
5/21/05 "After dinner, Sliv and Kev came over, and we officially christened our new band, 'Schmooze,' so you guys can check us out at myspace.com/schmooze.
5/21/05 (later) "Or maybe, maybe it's the fact that I do care, but I try to cover it up with a big ol' phony smile, a weak attempt at a laugh, and a pinch of self-humiliation."
5/22/05 "This year, it was just a drag and a burden."
5/24/05 "The Conspiracy at the Vatican and Its Impact on the Modern World"
5/25/05 "I'm not joking and I'm not being sarcastic."
5/27/05 "I think I'm becoming depressed."
5/29/05 "I wish I could say the same about last night, but I really don't consider cleaning bird shit off of my pool deck the greatest night ever."
5/31/05 "So, we are going to hold this massive concert in our bassist Kev's grandmom's backyard."
6/3/05 "Here's to summer!"
6/4/05 "IF I SENT YOU A LINK ON AIM, I APOLOGIZE."
6/6/05 "I figure regardless of how many times I'm the only percussionist at concert band practice, regardless of how many football games I attend just to play the goddamn cowbell, regardless of how many lessons I go to, or how many times I play the fucking crash cymbals for hours on end for a graduation that means nothing to me, I'll still only be a pathetic sixth period drummer to him."
6/11/05 "I'm at the library right now, so I don't feel like giving a huge update."
6/12/05 "Marie, you are an amazing girl, I'm so glad I met you, and I hope our relationship works out (I'm positive it will)."
6/15/05 "I also have four parties in the next ten days, I fucking love summer."
6/18/05 "I chugged seven full cups of 'fruit punch,' so I'm not really sure exactly what happened the entire night, but I do remember getting mad at people for pushing me around and laughing at me while I was under the influence, which is completely unfair to me."
6/19/05 "These are the most disgusting picture on the internet today, in my opinion... DO NOT CLICK if you are squeamish in any way."
6/22/05 "If you could do anything right now what would it be: Go buy a bunch of pudding."
6/25/05 "Hey, any party with a firepit is a good party."
6/29/05 "Are the puppets on Sesame Street considered Muppets?"
6/30/05 "I BETTER GET A COMMENT FROM EVERYONE!"
7/5/05 "The party will be like John Lennon would have liked it to be—peaceful, very relaxed, chilled, and NON-stressful."
7/9/05 "When I first arrived, there was a bunch of kids there, more than I had originally expected, as it turns out, they had assumed there would be alcohol there, which wasn't the case."
7/10/05 "Ever since I read that book, I've been thinking like my life is a movie, I'm just watching it."
7/11/05 "Oh yeah, and we put the fire out... without water."
7/15/05 "Hanging out with her is like hanging out with Buddha, only more fun and less religious."
7/23/05 "I can't say that anyone shed any blood this week, but we are all family now."
7/26/05 "YOU WILL NOT BE ADMITTED IF YOU ARE NOT WEARING A TOGA, AND I MEAN IT."
7/30/05 "So me and Harry are walking on the tracks, and we hear some lady yell, 'where's the party, boys?' but in all honesty, we were just taking a shortcut to Cindy's house, and I turned around to explain that, when I saw the police badge in her hand."
8/5/05 "Kids, don't forget to apply sunscreen to your upper thighs!"
8/13/05 "Tuesday, we wake up for the water park, but it was raining, so I slept for a few more hours, and then Harry hooked up with some random chick."
8/17/05 "CHEERS TO THE END OF SUMMER!!!"
8/18/05 "First of all, I'm positive that you would know if you had a piece of someone else's soul embedded in your forehead."
8/22/05 "My calendar is suddenly empty for tomorrow night, so if you're doing anything fun and exciting, give me a call... but remember, I'm taking antibiotics."
8/24/05 "I think there's something that should be set out in the open: Marie and I broke up."
8/27/05 "Drinking, or refusing to drink, means nothing to me."
8/28/05 "I love you, Burholme, I love you."
8/29/05 "What do you look for in a relationship?:: A girl that thinks that when I do something crazy and fun, that she'll join in with me as opposed to calling me immature."
9/3/05 "Oh yeah, forgot to mention that I am grounded, for two weeks."
9/4/05 "C'mon, God, put me in a coma!"
9/6/05 "My parents never told me that there was no Santa Claus, the lie was just kind of unraveled over time."
9/6/05 (later) "So many other things happened this summer, I could not possibly fit it all here."
9/11/05 "I ordered some obscure CDs from Amazon, I'm hoping they get here soon."
9/15/05 "I don't like any of my classes."
9/16/05 "In retribution, I got two lungs full of silly string gas, and immediately puked all over the lawn."
9/18/05 "I think this could possibly be the worst time in my life to contract mono."
9/23/05 "At least it's noncontagious."
9/26/05 "And the damn pirate wouldn't let me have any rum!"
10/3/05 "I'm thinking we should all 'play some scrabble,' as the kids are saying these days.
10/7/05 "Hey, I was in the stall the other day at La Salle, and the writing on the wall said 'Freshman Fuck Day—October 13th,' does anyone have any clue what this means?
10/12/05 "At least something good has happened this week so far: Elizabeth asked me to the Little Flower formal, and I'm really excited about that."
10/16/05 "P.S. I'm gonna be on fucking MTV!"
10/18/05 "Yeah, you know the show: a rich girl whines and complains, has a big party, and everyone exclaims, 'This is going to make her so popular!'"
10/23/05 "Then, all of a sudden, they decide to randomly beat the shit out of some kid, just for fun."
10/25/05 "Wow... I'm such a loser."
10/27/05 "I'm pretty sure a three-year-old could do my job."
10/29/05 "Cheers to everyone I saw tonight, in no particular order: Harry, Mary, Kyle, his friends, Keelan, Maryrose, Elizabeth, Cathleen, Andrew FUCKING Rigney!, that kid Ed, LA FEVER, other kid, Chris Clark, Kyle Callaghan, Sliv, Kev, Alexis, Brianna, Ciara, Michelle, Amanda, the clerk from Wawa, that dude in the ghost outfit, the cop who chased me, Andy, Tina, everyone at Lafayette, including Michael Myers, the entire LF soccer team, Chris Cheesesteak, my sister Jenn, her two friends, my parents, firepit, that old guy in Wawa with the stringy hair, the guy who was weird, the guy in the baby costume, the girls who were going to the costume party, the British Lady, the lady that wanted a half cup of Lentil soup, the woman at Hunan Wok's who I saw in the reflection of the door, and last but not least, the man on the moon!"
11/1/05 "And we frolicked in the graveyard."
11/3/05 "Saturday: Go to SCHMOOZE'S FIRST GIG."
11/6/05 "Psss... I'm having another birthday party this year... probably December 9th... and I expect everyone to be there..."
11/7/05 "If anyone wants to chill at Burholme tonight, they are more than welcome."
11/17/05 "Okay, so I came up with a list of 110 people who I want to be at my party."
11/22/05 "An old lady farted in my face on Saturday."
12/3/05 "Okay, so my parents only expect like 30 people at my party, which makes me kind of worried, because if my estimates are correct, over 100 people will be showing up."
12/6/05 "So fuck you Action News, fuck you AccuWeather, fuck you Mother nature, I hate you all."
12/8/05 "The cops will definitely make an appearance, so seriously, don't be an idiot."
12/11/05 "Okay, it really wasn't necessary for people to leave empty beer cans all over my yard."
12/18/05 "Therefore, I am going to try to inject some Christmas into my life, and throw the First Annual Buy-a-Tree-and-Carry-It-to-Burholme-and-Decorate-It-and-Drink-Eggnog Party."
12/23/05 "Except that Presentation was sold out of trees, so we just went into the woods for the hell of it."
12/28/05 "Shit, I always have fun at dances."
12/30/05 "I learned through this experience that this xanga is public, and everyone can read it, so I shouldn’t write everything I want to write, because it’ll eventually screw me over in the end."
1/8/06 "Let's just say that, because of a failed attempt at an apology, I got depressed as hell and tried to jump out of a moving vehicle."
1/12/06 "Fitzy got kicked out of school, finally, after all the killing threats and bomb threats and fighting with lab managers; this time, he knocked Mr. Clemente, a handicapped teacher, off his mobile scooter."
1/15/06 "I wish girls didn't have to let you know that they liked you."
1/22/06 "It was great because 1) so many random ass people showed up that I haven’t seen in a while, 2) the amount of people made for a huge rush of energy on stage, 3) a harmonica solo, 4) mosh pits, 5) getting lost going to the after party, 6) finding the after-party and playing scrabble."
1/27/06 "Just swell."
1/30/06 "Copy other people’s work on any non-graded assignment you can, even if you have to steal vocabulary books out of people’s backpacks."
2/5/06 "Give me a comment and I'll give you a dollar."
2/11/06 "Fuck yeah, Burholme make their first demo, to be on sale soon!"
2/12/06 "There is a God."
2/13/06 "Another day wasted."
2/14/06 "Yes, you are fucking single for Valentine's Day, but we all are!!"
2/15/06 "Do I have any true friends?"
2/20/06 "It ain't gonna be pretty, folks."
2/26/06 "BUY A BURHOLME DEMO, SUPPORT OUR BAND!!"
3/2/06 "P.S. You are a douchebag."
3/6/06 "My stomach shut up when I thought about the fucking blast we had roaming the streets of Cheltenham at three o’clock in the morning."
3/11/06 "Rita's is open."
3/15/06 "You won’t regret it (and even if it isn’t that good, at least you’ll get to see me drunk in a clown wig)."
3/23/06 "I asked Mr. Russell to go to prom with me."
3/26/06 "I’ve come to question lately why anyone would want to be my friend, seeing as I treat them like shit."
3/28/06 "I know everyone and still manage to have no friends."
4/3/06 "Doesn’t seem that bad as I type it out, but you gotta admit that’s a lot of shit to worry about."
4/4/06 "'I don’t see what the problem is here, Joe, you are always falling asleep, you rarely participate.'"
4/9/06 "I’ve been realizing lately that I don’t like to sleep."
4/11/06 "A few people laughed, more people gave strange looks, but mostly people just yelled 'fag!' at me."
4/12/06 "Today I put on a Jason mask and delivered a pizza to Mr. Young during his eighth period class through the window."
4/19/06 "I cleaned my room and found $105.77."
4/23/06 "Whoever lied to us and said there was a Quiznos on Verree Road must die."
5/3/06 "I say 'Andrew Pierce is locked in a trunk! and he can’t breathe!'"
5/8/06 "Jim White unbuttoned his top button!"
5/12/06 "Honestly, 'Shout!' is the greatest song of all time."
5/14/06 "And now it’s 9:02 PM, and I’m about to start a five-page research paper."
5/17/06 "Guys aren't allowed inside the Mount anymore, so she literally chases me and Matt Stone out of the parking lot and down the street."
5/21/06 "I was camping on the beach in Wildwood and met... hot girl scouts?!"
5/26/06 "What happened this year was that I found my niche in the La Salle social scene, and I think the thing that made this year so great was doing Godspell."
5/29/06 "Then we prank called everyone we knew, walked to Wawa at 1 AM, and hit on fourteen-year-old girls."
5/31/06 "It just doesn't make sense."
6/4/06 "I'm grounded for a while."
6/5/06 "Perhaps he should've written, 'Joe was a jackass most of the third and fourth quarters.'"
6/10/06 "I pity all those guys that think anorexia is going to solve their weight problems, they don't know what they are getting into."
6/13/06 "You’d think that I would care enough to stop doing certain things, selfish things that come at the expense of friends and family, but I still continue to fuck up."
6/14/06 "Father Harrison will be there, so make sure you don't show up too drunk (I'm kidding of course, if you show up drunk you will receive a STERN WARNING!)!"
6/18/06 "But I fixed some broken friendships, formed new ones, strengthened old ones, and reaffirmed my faith that maybe I am cared about in this world."
6/22/06 "'Joe, it is so good to see you with clothes on this time.' —his grandmother"
6/24/06 "I’m not gonna lie, xanga is getting pretty fucking old."
6/29/06 "What was the last lie you said?: That I was going to Cindy's house tonight, but I was actually going to Mary's, and even though we weren't doing anything illegal at all there, my parents will always remember what happened that one time at Mary's."
7/2/06 "I miss his fuzzy steel-wool-hair head."
7/6/06 "Goddamn, I love summer."
7/8/06 "Then we went to the playground and tipped over a port-a-potty."
7/10/06 "When does human life begin?"
7/13/06 "Who else can claim they chilled on the train tracks at 3 AM last night?"
7/18/06 "'The pools were appealing to the eye but……there was no parental supervision of the kids running around they were in every pool on the ship and just to let you all know i do have children 4 girls in age from 6 to 12 so that being said I do love kids but……the ship’s staff said nothing of the cannonballs, splashin, running around, and the teenagers that were roughhousing around every pool.'"
7/21/06 "This is the first time I’ll be outside of the U.S., and what better way to do it then with a boat-load of horny girls?!"
7/30/06 "Everything people said about it was true: Wild teenagers DID run around the decks at 4 AM (I can still picture the looks of horror from the senior citizens as I and 20 other teens ran screaming across the deck, jumping into a hot tub built for eight and somehow fitting everyone in)."
8/7/06 "Whenever I’m around, I just get this feeling that people are thinking, like, 'Who invited this jerk?'"
8/9/06 "I most certainly enjoy jamming with my band (first time we’ve practice in like five weeks), going to the movies (to see the new Will Ferrell movie, which was basically one big commercial for Applebee’s and Wonder Bread) after work (where a mass plastic fork fight ended in an old lady finding a piece of fork in her jello), and playing frisbee in the park with Pierce, Katie Corr, and JIM WHITE (who was looking sexy as usual)."
8/14/06 "To top it all off, I got a phone call from a drunk older kid threatening to beat me up—over SIX DOLLARS."
8/21/06 "Can ANY relationship last?"
8/22/06 "FUCK, my senior year is now rendered meaningless."
8/25/06 "Well I'm glad that worked out okay."
8/26/06 "Tonight was one of the craziest nights of my life."
8/30/06 "Standing on the fire pit, surveying my kingdom of Burholme from atop"
9/2/06 "Standing in the rain playing the cowbell for a winning football team, drinking a 'Best Chest' and jamming with the band, hanging at Wawa with some old grade school buddies, wrestling girls in basements... I could go on and on."
9/5/06 "I have a schoolbag that, for once, isn’t filled with cans of beer."
9/6/06 "Walking into the library yelling 'Keg at Evan Raisner’s!' probably left a bad impression."
9/10/06 "And what scares me the most is this—if I can’t deal with senior year, how the fuck am I going to deal with the rest of my life?"
9/17/06 "irishboss30: i woke up this morning and there was all this dirt in my bed, and a few leaves, no lie, so i quickly got a shower and took the sheets off my bed."
9/19/06 "I threw a banana against the wall as hard as I could, and it exploded, and it was at that moment that I knew this autumn was going to be hell."
9/29/06 "I smoked a cigarette naked on the dock of the lake, and I saw so many penises and balls and asses that I thought I was going to vomit."
10/1/06 "I regret having my dad pick me up the morning after Halloween because I'm puking with a hangover, and on the ride home I yell at him because 'just because I'm sick doesn’t mean I drank!'"
10/4/06 "I am, after all, a cowbell player, and I play this revered instrument proudly."
10/9/06 "Oh, and my Mom drunk-dialed me at 1:30 AM"
10/10/06 "And then I wrote how, instead of dealing with all this shit, I’d rather run away and live with the bums in Burholme park."
10/26/06 "I didn't wear shoes in school today, and no one noticed or cared."
11/5/06 "I’m drunk, you're drunk, what the hell is the point of making out?!?!"
11/12/06 "I need everyone that reads this to write a note or letter to my parents, requesting that I be allowed to have a party."
11/21/06 "I'm not allowed to have a party."
12/11/06 "I’ve been kind of slacking on updating xanga."
12/18/06 "An excerpt from the rap I wrote for Dr. Ryan’s English class, based on the prologue of the Canterbury Tales:"
1/1/07 "And of course, in late December, I got arrested, but you already know the story."
2/14/07 "I pinched myself to see if it was real this time."
2/21/07 "Mr. Norman has a fetish for bald women."
3/1/07 "It seems that I’ll be heading to La Salle University in the fall."
4/16/07 "I caused someone to stop believing in God."
6/1/07 "One final beer was left, we placed it firmly on the firepit, unopened, because perhaps some mixed-up teen will come down to the 'pit and find that beer, and look around, and say, 'hey, this isn’t such a bad place to hang out.'"
6/8/07 "As a waiter, I have to serve on these old folks hand and foot, only to be bitched at because the soup isn’t hot enough and the coffee is decaf not regular."
6/19/07 "And for the first time in about 24 hours, I smiled."
7/7/07 "Back to the Future got me thinking about decisions I’ve made in the past, and how they’ve affected my present, mainly because of a drunk dial I got from some chick I used to like."
7/10/07 "I know that my future could easily be as memorable as my past, but I can’t help but worry sometimes that the best years of my life are already almost past."
7/18/07 "As we approach July 21st, I can’t help but feel a mixture of emotions—excited, nervous, anxious, elated, depressed, it’s all there... yes, I'm talking about the final Harry Potter novel, The Deathly Hallows."
7/20/07 "But if you’re talking about a real kiss, a real fucking kiss that makes your head spin and your knees ache and the proverbially fireworks explode on the insides of your eye sockets, then, well, I'm just not sure I’ve ever had one, at least not in recent memory."
7/29/07 "Each and every time I throw up while drinking, I had previously eaten some kind of sandwich with onions in it."
8/5/07 "Due to an unlucky series of events, we were unable to buy kegs from Oxford because a fake ID mysteriously vanished, even though THE SAME LADY WAS WORKING YESTERDAY AS THE DAY BEFORE, WHEN SHE SAW US USE THE ID."
8/14/07 "Let’s start off by saying that through the nine days or so my family was gone, my guests and I finished off, by my final count, 832 beers (that’s eighteen cases of Lionshead, six cases of Natty Light, two cases of Keystone Light, a case of Beast, and a half keg of Miller Lite)."
8/18/07 "Thank you, fans, for supporting us through the years; thanks too for dancing your hearts out last night and getting into every song."
8/22/07 "A subtle lesson I learned this summer is the definition of friendship."
8/23/07 "But a wise philosopher once said that only in the absence of a friend do you really come to appreciate him."
9/2/07 "It feels weird being back home."
9/10/07 "Like, I’m trying to punch a hole in the bathroom door by this point, challenging people to fight me because 'my dad bought this keg.'"
9/16/07 "While my peers trekked to the various frats to fill their dirty cups from dirty kegs in dirty basements with dirty douchebags breathing down their necks, I walked with Chrissy to get some ice cream."
9/21/07 "Sure enough, a puddle of urine lay at the foot of my bed."
9/28/07 "This past summer, all I saw on La Salle University’s facebook group was “I WANNA GET SO TRASHED!!” which I guess is alright if you are into that—I personally think that’s a bit overkill—but nevertheless one cannot deny that drinking is a top priority for a lot of kids."
10/20/07 "Goddamn, I’ve been in the mood for Checkers for so long now."
10/21/07 "I spent our subway token money on pizza, and I legitimately do not remember how we got on the subway, I kind of just came out of my blackout and we were on it."
10/23/07 "I woke up with two things this morning: a girlfriend and a hangover."
10/28/07 "I woke up this morning in women's clothing, having pissed my pants."
11/2/07 "And then I had another urination incident in my room."
11/12/07 "Now I’ll come back from La Salle and I’ll say what I’ve been up to, and people will laugh, but it won’t be the same."
11/21/07 "Have you ever been in a situation that you can never be happy unless you upset someone else, and since they will be unhappy from your actions, you will, in turn, become unhappy, thus it’s impossible to ever be happy, because whatever you do you’re going to upset someone?"
12/12/07 "As it turns out, La Salle was the PERFECT school for me."
12/16/07 "The fucking neighbors called the police."
12/20/07 "Fuck, I don’t see myself doing a goddamn thing after college."
1/1/08 "The passage of time makes me bitter, because the times I am having in the present are so goddamn great, and I’m scared that I’ll suddenly be unhappy one day, and I’ll never be able to go back to the past and be happy like I know I am now and have been the past twelve months."
1/14/08 "Maybe I’ll feel better once Thursday night comes, and I’m back out on the town, with my beer and my bros, maybe."
1/21/08 "I repeat, do what will make you happy, and if the people that love you truly love you, they will be happy as well."
1/23/08 "I can't handle shots."
2/3/08 "Albert Camus said, so I’m told, that humans are so noble in nature because of their willingness to prevail."
2/18/08 "He said 'every Thursday I feel like the king of the world, and every Sunday night I want to commit suicide.'"
2/25/08 "The question, I suppose, that Keats raises is the following: What is better, the longing for love, or the finding love and have it rot away?"
2/29/08 "Note to self: assume that everyone that shouldn’t be reading your xanga is reading your xanga."
3/2/08 "Driving down an empty road on a warm summer night, windows down, drumming on the steering wheel, yelling at the top of my lungs, hot damn!"
3/10/08 "Because I’m drinking and playing beer pong tomorrow afternoon!"
3/14/08 "I sit in this chair, and I smile, and I am content."
3/25/08 "To do what is right is making me fucking sad and lonely."
3/31/08 "Honestly, the college lifestyle is grinding me down—I’m always tired, always under pressure to get something done, to go somewhere, and I’m almost always drunk every night."
4/14/08 "Jesus Christ, I can't deal with this."
4/24/08 "When I used the phrase 'bust a load' she assumed I meant 'to shit a huge poop.'"
5/19/08 "The dude in the car proceeds to then chase us, in his car, ACROSS THE SIDEWALK."
5/24/08 "I apologize for being a drunken load."
6/17/08 "Feel free to come visit us over at our new blog, Puke on Your Birthday."
No comments:
Post a Comment