This Is My Blood: Honker's Ale

Eventually, I was going to fuck up this beer project. It was inevitable. I am not a smart man, and this is not going to go perfectly. My biggest fear was that I was going to go an entire day and forget to drink a beer. Thankfully, that didn't happen. No, this fuck-up is fixable. But it still made me feel like a fucking fool.

Yesterday, I drank St. John Street from Goose Island. I had bought two crowlers from the brewhouse, and planned on drinking one yesterday and one today. I knew one of them was an English Bitter, and one of the was an American Pre-Prohibition Pilsner. But somehow, I got them mixed up. I thought I was drinking an English Bitter when I was drinking the St. John Street. I drank the whole fucking crowler while thinking that. I wrote the whole goddamn blog post while thinking that. The mistake slipped through because the crowler wasn't labeled with the beer style, just the name, and Beer Advocate didn't have it listed (it was listed on Untappd, but that website rarely has the beer style description).

Anyways, like I said, it's fixable. I am going back and editing yesterday's blog post, and I'll write about Pre-Prohibition Pilsner there. I'll copy/paste/edit what I wrote yesterday on today's blog post. All good. Nothing is permanent on Puke on Your Birthday, except the permanency of my shame.

Still, what does Chef Gusteau say in Ratatouille? You need to be brave when trying something new, willing to make mistakes. Mistakes are how you learn. I will never forget what an American Pre-Prohibition Lager tastes like, and I will never forget how an English Bitter compares.

English Bitter
(#1)
Exemplified by Honker's Ale

I was really excited to try an English Bitter, because it's listed first in Tasting Beer, and so that means that it is a classic beer style, possible THE classic beer style in modern history.

You know how we Americans have pale ales and IPAs? Well, the British do as well. The only difference between the American versions and the British versions is the type of malts and hops used (I say "only" acknowledging that this is a HUGE difference in the grand scheme of things, but you know what I mean). There are "English-style hops" that achieve the same purpose as American-style hops, but smell and taste differently. I have no fucking idea how to describe exactly how they taste differently. I can only say that you need to taste them both, and you'll know right away that there's a difference. I know! This is frustrating when you're reading a blog and you want answers! Imagine how it feels writing about it!

Okay, but if the English have pale ales and IPAs, then what is an English bitter? Appropriately, the bitterness is about the same as a pale ale (it would be weird if a bitter was less bitter, no?), but the gravity (i.e. how much "stuff" is in the malt being brewed) is lighter. Adjuncts are used to lighten the body too (adjuncts are the grains besides barley added—think how Bud Light uses rice). This is legit, because my thought while drinking it was definitely "this has the consistency of water." Not the taste, mind you, just the mouthfeel. I kinda liked it. It was a beer built for session drinking. I really liked it, and I'm excited to try a couple more English beer varieties over the next couple days.

NOTES

BEER: Honker's Ale

GENRE: English Bitter

ABV: 4.3%

BREWED BY: Goose Island Brewhouse (Philadelphia)

LOCATION: Philly (original Goose Island is in Chicago, and unlike St. John Street, they brew Honkers Ale in Chicago as well)

PURCHASED AT: the brewery, curbside pickup

PAIRED WITH: Bratwurst on the grill (England and Germany are close enough that this pairing made sense, culturally)

GRADE: 2.5 pukes out of 5

BEER COUNT: 221.5